Space is GOODT

 It seems that society has influenced us to believe that space in friendships and relationships is a bad thing. We all realistically have to live our own lives separately. It's okay to allow your friends to take time to themselves and allow them to focus on their dreams and goals.

It's okay to give your partner space to go on that business trip they've always wanted to go on or to go on that walk at the park after an argument. We don't have to talk and be around people 24/7 for them to know we love and care for them. I believe society has influenced us to think that we have to be on people's coattails every second of the day.

I used to say I wanted to be a part of my partner's journey at every moment I could. But in actuality, I can't do that. I have to believe I am there in spirit and let them grow and learn whatever God has for them to receive at this moment.

I think it's important to determine what you will do with the time that you are separated from whoever and whatever. So when you are reunited with that thing again or back around the person, the time can mean so much more.

Here's what I think really matters to discuss when the meet-up happens:

1. Are you guys able to connect without phones?
2. Are y'all able to hold meaningful conversations and pick each other's brains?
3. Explore what each other has been up to.
4. Any new interests?
5. Anything new you've learned recently?
6. Any new books, podcasts, or songs that have shifted your mindset since we last spoke?
7. Any new goals you want to work towards?
8. Any goals you have achieved and didn't realize?
9. Is there laughter involved, like is fun taking place in this interaction?

Instead of feeling attacked that your friends aren't hanging out with you, try not to be selfish here and think maybe they need this time apart, so let me go and pour into myself and do some things that bring me joy in the meantime between time.

Who knows, these conversations you might have at the meet-up may segue them into a new chapter or unlock something in them they needed to say out loud to put fuel to their ass. Sometimes we are scared to communicate and get too "deep" or not know what the "perfect" thing is to say, but really it's not about being deep. There is no perfect, just showing up to the conversation as you is the best thing you can do. Don't overcompensate or overcomplicate things. It's just getting to know the people in your life a little better than just surface-level things that don't build a connection. How can you call someone your friend and you don't even know what one of their personal goals is or one thing that will bring them joy?

I think we should stop waiting for people to converse with us and be the conversationalist when the time is presented to us. Instead of focusing on the bad and thinking space is bad, think, "How can space be a good thing in this moment?"